update: from JCs perspective

So be patient as you wait for the Lord’s return. Consider the farmers who patiently wait for the rains in the fall and the spring. They eagerly look for the valuable harvest to ripen. You, too, must be patient. Take courage, for the coming of the Lord is near. James 5: 7-8

It’s been quite some time since we’ve updated anything on this blog and that’s in large part to the lack of movement, but even more than that I’ve started to wonder if the lack of updates have come from our heart’s not being in the right place. This adoption experience has been interesting to say the least. We jumped in with both feet, experienced every emotion I could imagine. We hit the highest of high’s then were drug down to the lowest of low’s months after the suspension. At least we thought that was the lowest of lows. Recently, we have spent a lot of time talking about the future of the adoption, will it ever happen, should we change paths, what are God’s plans? Our approach and questions seem logical especially given all of our friends ask the same questions (and secretly they probably think we are crazy for as long as we’ve been going through this). I don’t blame them  because we’ve asked ourselves that same questions. I recently shared some thoughts on this with our Life Group about how this process has caused me to section off this part of my life because it’s too much to deal with when I need to function as an employee, father and  husband. If I’m not careful, I could let this consume every minute of my life. So now I wonder, if this is really something that can consume my life, how much am I really trusting that God has a plan? It bothers me to say that I haven’t been. I’ve been relying on my own strength/understanding/direction and I think I can say I’m done with that.

SO with all that said, we’re making a change. We believe that God has a plan to bring Vera home (and hopefully very soon). I’ll be traveling to the DRC for the first time to meet our daughter face to face. We believe God has a plan to use this trip as a means to start the process of getting her home. We aren’t sure how, we aren’t sure what will be accomplished, really we don’t know much, aside from that He has a plan and wants us to be obedient to his direction and patient with his timing.

As I travel over, we would be honored if you would pray for us. Pray for Tori’s sanity and safety while I’m gone. Pray that God could make his plans clear for me and that I could be obedient to follow regardless of the outcome.

taking action

Every year our church staff attends Catalyst, a conference for church leaders. From the opening session, I knew God was telling me something. I have chills now just thinking about it. And every session thereafter, God used each speaker to teach me something. I believe we all get something different from a message based upon what God has placed on our heart. And while I gained valuable leadership principles that apply to my job, I know God used that conference to open my eyes to an idea… a way that He wants to work through us in regards to the adoption. Taking steps forward, out of love & obedience, in order for God to move in a situation that seems impossible.

A few of the quotes from the conference that continue to inspire me:
…You have no idea what hangs in the balance of your decision to embrace the burden God has put on your heart. –Andy Stanley
…If we aren’t careful, we will be more in love with the idea of changing the world or following Jesus, than of actually changing the world or following Jesus. –Eugene Cho
…When your experience doesn’t align with your expectation, God is trying to reveal Himself to you. -Robert Madu
…You have to get going in order for God to show up. –Danielle Strickland
…God has not called us to a hard task. He’s called us to an impossible task that will require our obedience. –Rich Wilkerson Jr.
…Do whatever will make you remain in love. –Bob Goff

Wow. Just wow. It may mean nothing to you, but to me, it’s clearly God saying – Hey, you need to DO SOMETHING. So far with the adoption, we have not taken any action to make anything happen. Well, we’ve paid a bunch of money and completed a million forms (and are starting to do those forms a second time because they are expiring due to the length of time we’ve been in process). But we haven’t done anything outside of the norm. We’ve complained a lot and been frustrated with the government for the suspension.  We’ve DOUBTED God BIG TIME.  We’ve given up hope. We’ve prayed, but it’s been awhile since we’ve prayed the prayers where you believe with all your heart that God will do it (James 1:5-8). We felt like we needed to do something, but we didn’t know what to do and ultimately just felt like whatever we did wouldn’t make any difference.

Well, that's about to change, we are DOING SOMETHING. We are acting but really we are praying GOD will DO SOMETHING. JC is traveling to DRC to meet Vera. We are praying for doors of opportunity to be opened, and for God to bring Vera home.  This is one of those situations that will require God, well - every situation requires God, but with the adoption suspension currently in place, there is NO amount of human effort that will bring her home. It will only be God. And that’s what we are praying for. We are stepping out in faith, truly. The trip is not cheap. Honestly, it’s a lot of money we don’t have. But with God placing this on our heart, we are called to be obedient and He will take care of us.

Last month, our church went through the book of Nehemiah. This story was so timely for me.  Nehemiah’s heart broke and he took action. While he was an incredible leader and organizer, the wall was rebuilt in 52 days. God made it happen.  The note in my Bible for Nehemiah 4:14 says, “God is in the business of working through people to accomplish seemingly impossible tasks.” That has stuck with me. Right now, it seems impossible that JC will bring Vera home when he travels there, but God can do the impossible. Take a look back through the stories of all the miracles Jesus performed. It is his J.O.B to do the impossible in order to bring glory to His name.

So we are trusting. We are believing. We are praying – “Ask using my name and you will receive. And you will have abundant joy.” (John 16:24)

Please pray with us. Specifically, pray for:
-God to do the impossible!
-Doors of opportunity to be opened
-Favor with the government, officials, and other contacts
-Our heart to be broken like Nehemiah’s, and that it would help JC continue to take steps forward even if doors don’t seem to be opening
-Safety in travels
-Vera’s heart to be prepared, that she would automatically trust JC
-JC and Vera’s bonding & relationship
-God's armor to be with JC (we've heard the area is very dark spiritually, and anytime you are doing the Lord's work, the enemy will try to prevent it)
-Wisdom in all of JCs encounters

Lately, I have been overwhelmed by the encouragement God has given me through His word.  I read something yesterday and it really sums everything up:
“The prizes of life are at the end of each journey, not near the beginning; and it is not given to me to know how many steps are necessary in order to reach my goal. Failure I may still encounter at the thousandth step, yet success hides behind the next bend in the road. Never will I know how close it lies unless I turn the corner. I will build my castle one brick at a time, for I know that small attempts repeated will complete any undertaking.”  -from "The Greatest Secret in the World"

a Father's love

Finally an update on this blog.... Extremely well written by JC. I am so incredibly thankful to walk (albeit slowly) through this adoption process with him.

In September, we found out that the DGM (the body responsible for all entry and exits in the Congo) had issued a statement that all exit letters for adoptees were going to be suspended for 12 months. The caveat to that was a group of individuals whose case had already reached a certain point in the process in which they would get grandfathered in. Unfortunately, we are not far enough along in the process to be part of the grandfathering. We spoke with our agency and they did not (and I believe still do not) think that the suspension will last for a full 12 months. However, today there was a conference call in which the US government mentioned they believed the suspension could last for every bit of 12 months and potentially longer.

When Tori first told me about the call, my first thought (and unfortunately exact words) was how could they “extort” us like that. I mean we’ve financially gone through the entire process, we have passed our first court case in the Congo (which in my terms means we are legally her guardians in that country). The US has most of our documentation which is the near final step. So how could they do this to us? She’s our daughter and she belongs here!

Today, was my first experience to truly understand a fathers love. You wouldn’t think (at least I didn’t) that going through this process, you would get emotionally connected to a child that you’ve never touched, talked with, or held but I was wrong. For those of you that have children, imagine the idea of sending your child to live anywhere else but with you and not knowing when you would get the next chance to hug them or tuck them in or anything a father would do with their child. It simply hurts. And knowing that there is literally nothing you can do makes it even worse.

After my rush of emotions and tears, I started to realize that feeling is the same way God feels about us. I’ve heard that for years but today, experiencing it, has opened my eyes to a different level of love that I feel for Vera. I realized that there is something we can do, the only thing we can do, which is Pray. There is a real chance it could be years before Vera is home, but God committed us to this path. Tori and I are focused on God’s plan for our lives and our children so we will commit this situation to his direction. We would like to ask that you join us in prayer. Not just to bring Vera home, but all of the other orphaned children all over the world. That God would make a way to break chains of bureaucracy and red tape and anything else that could get in the way of his purpose for all of us.

2nd birthday & progress!

On June 25, we received news from our agency that Vera’s birth certificate was issued!  Aside from it being great news because it’s a milestone in the process to bring her home, we now know her birthday… A day we’ll always celebrate!  With her being orphaned and not knowing family or even her real name, it’s impossible to know her real birth date.  Even if they did know her parents, it’s not guaranteed they would know her birth date… as we learned during our mission trip in Kenya, birthdays are definitely not as much of a celebration.  Many of the children in the school we visited in Kenya couldn’t tell you what day they were born – many had no clue when their birthday was.  Aside from that, it’s very uncommon for children in DRC to be issued a birth certificate when they are born.  So part of the adoption process is to get a “new” birth certificate issued.  We were able to request when we wanted her birth date to be, but they don’t guarantee they’ll actually honor your request.  They didn’t honor our request but that’s okay, because God knows best.  Vera’s new/official/the only one she’ll ever know birth date is June 25, 2011… which makes her TWO YEARS OLD!!!  We have a two year old?! Time for a celebration!  It hurt our hearts to think about not being with our sweet girl on her birthday but the reality is, she has no idea it was her birthday.  Hopefully this is the last year we’ll have to spend apart on her birthday.  JC and I celebrated at home with cupcakes, singing, and thinking about the memories we’ll make with Vera when she comes home.

With the birth certificate received, we can apply for court on Wednesday, July 10!  Progress!  It typically takes a couple of weeks to get a court date and then after we get through the first court date, we can apply for our i600 (probably means nothing to you, and we’re still trying to understand what everything means too)!  Basically… good news!  After the i600 is approved, they’ll begin the 3-6 month investigation process, now required for all DRC adoptions to prevent any unethical situations. 

We’re so grateful to hear of this progress with Vera.  Since February, we’ve been making progress but it’s been more the steps to get us to where we are now – where we are working with the DRC government & US Embassy to bring our girl home!  With each step, you can start to see the light at the end of the tunnel which is us making the long flight to DRC to meet Vera and making the long flight back to her forever home!  Oh how I just dream about that day.